‘You’re rehired’ and ‘Well, this is awkward!’
One story, one man, dominates all of Thursday’s front pages. “You’re rehired” is how the Sun puts it as Donald Trump, former host of The Apprentice – where his catchphrase was “You’re fired!” – gets his old job in the White House back for “Season 2”.
“America’s Golden Age” – Metro’s headline is a quote from Trump’s election victory speech, with the word “golden” coloured as orange. “Trump comeback win shocks world,” the paper says, adding that a “shattered” Kamala Harris was “in bed” after her “huge defeat”.
“Trump is back” declares the Financial Times over a photo of the politician pointing purposefully with an outstretched arm as his smiling wife Melania holds his other hand. In the background future Vice-President JD Vance can be seen smiling and clapping. One sub-headline reads: “Stocks open at new high amid global fears over tariffs.” Another says: “America’s democracy and alliances poised for turmoil.”
“Trump’s clean sweep” is the headline in the Daily Telegraph under a photo of a confident-looking Trump pointing at readers. He took “Senate, popular vote and every swing state in unprecedented political comeback”, it notes. Beneath the news story is an opinion piece by Reform UK leader and long-time Trump ally Nigel Farage where he seeks to explain the “remarkable breadth” of the Republican candidate’s appeal among voters, and predicts mounting pressure on the UK Prime Minister, Sir Keir Starmer. In the Matt cartoon, one alien in a flying saucer tells another: “I used to enjoy observing Earth, but recently the storylines have become too far-fetched.”
“Landslide” is how the i describes Trump’s “thumping win” over a photo of the politician smiling with his wife during his victory speech. He has, it says, been given a mandate for a “radical right-wing agenda to reshape America”. Europe now “fears trade war”, the paper adds, and Ukraine “despairs amid threat to end support”.
“American dread” clouds the front page of the Guardian, which carries a large close-up photo of a happy-looking Trump. The paper promises 25 pages of news, analysis and opinion about his “resounding victory”. It quotes Harris as vowing “to never give up and to keep fighting”.
“He’s been shot, convicted of a crime and branded a fascist… but he’s still the people’s choice,” reads the headline on the Daily Express. In other news, the Prince of Wales praises his wife who is “doing really well” and has been “amazing this whole year”. Catherine, Princess of Wales, is recovering after treatment for cancer.
“Trump promises golden age after sweeping Harris aside,” thunders the Times. Sub-headlines say “Victor returning to White House more powerful than ever” and “World braced for radical agenda on migration and trade”. The headlines on the opinion pieces pull no punches either: “Face it, liberals, this is what millions wanted” and “Stand by for West’s betrayal of Ukraine”.
“What have they done… again?” asks the Daily Mirror as “Trump returns to power”. There is “uncertainty and fear”, it adds, as the world is “rocked by staggering US election result”.
“Well, this is awkward!” laughs the Daily Star over a photo of a victorious Trump with an inset image of a shocked-looking Foreign Secretary David Lammy. Under the sub-headline “How it started.. How it’s going..”, Lammy’s past social media comments about the American politician, a “serial liar and a cheat”, are contrasted with his post-election message of congratulations.
It is a “comeback to Trump all comebacks”, puns the Daily Mail. The result is a “nightmare for Starmer and his Donald-loathing Cabinet” it says, while liberals in the US and Britain have been “left bewildered and tearful”.